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Kate Butler's avatar

I hear you Phil! Your words resonate deeply and often at times I feel so desperately alone with grief and life . Not as often thankfully as it used to be , but still when it hits , it hits hard , immobilising me . It always does pass though , even when I think it won’t , it does ! Life shifts and moves again .. 💜

I absolutely love your references to James Taylor and I am The Walrus and just to say I always feel very me when I’m around you , you are a lovely person .. go gently with yourself my friend xx

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Paul Draper's avatar

An honest and strong post with hopefully an element of catharsis. The melancholy of a nonadjustable past is the natural canvas of us in the middle of life, and it's ok to feel. I always think we process emotion like a river - let the emotion be observed but let it pass on too. We so often dam moments because we believe we need punishment, however severe or light. We could only have made the decisions we did at the time with no aid of hindsight.

Your point about short circuiting the catherine wheel of introspection is an important one I think. Being an Olympic-standard emotional ruminant myself, one that thieved days from myself through my 20s and 30s, I read a book that changed everything, one that spoke about stepping away from that malfunctioning toolbox that was trying to fix itself and constantly failing - the mind, and instead creating a playbook of mindful practices that evaporated unhelpful dolour when the time came for my mood to change. It's here if you fancy a read, and contains some useful devices that have helped me for a long time. https://shorturl.at/fijKM

It's been a pleasure to connect with you on various platforms. Please never lose sight of the good you do and the gentle power of a creative soul. I know it comes at a cost as we watch other stainless steel characters seem to repel raindrops, but I bet they don't really, the weather there is just less apparent. Thank you again for writing this, and of teaching me the word 'kintsugi'. I shall use that in a story.

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